The Red flags to look out for in Domestic Violence relationships
Top 5 red flags for a personal relationship:
- Jealous behaviour and/or accusing you of flirting or wanting someone else.
- Monitoring your behaviour, wanting to know where you are at all times, relentless calling or texting during the time you are away.
- Do not accept responsibility for situations and blame you for issues. Includes bad mouthing and blaming ex-partners to you.
- Call you and/or your family and friends names.
- Puts you down in private and/or public.
- Does not respect your opinions and wants things done their way only.
Behaviours that are abuse in a relationship:
- Total control over income where you need to ask for items you need or want. All bank accounts are in their name.
- Monitoring spending and demanding receipts.
- Abusing you, children or pets, either verbally or physically (pushing, pulling, hitting, spitting…)
- Forcing you to be sexual when you do not want to be.
- Intimidating, threatening or standing over you to get their own way.
Behaviours to look for in friends or colleagues that you suspect are in an abusive relationship:
- Physical signs such as black eyes, bruises, unexplained pain.
- Wearing clothes that cover their body (whatever the weather) to potentially hide signs of physical abuse.
- Emotional signs: Flinching with sudden movements, increased anxiety and/or crying, numb and distracted. These could be from trauma not only Domestic violence.
- Behavioural signs: withdrawing or isolating yourself, not attending social events, avoiding things they usually enjoy, sleeping too much or too little.
If you are experiencing domestic violence, remember:
- You are not to blame. The domestic abuse perpetrator is 100% responsible and it is up to them to ask for help to change. You cannot do it for them.
- Even if the abuser gets help for their violence and abuse, it does not always mean they will change.
- Couples therapy, mediation, anger management or individual counselling for the abuse are not safe interventions if your relationship is abusive.
- Help and support is available for you.
While Open Support supports over 80 woman and children p/a through our domestic and family violence programs and services, we do not offer a 24/7 crisis line. If you or someone you know is in crisis, waiting could become dangerous, so please call 1800 656 463 who are open 24/7 and they can always refer you back to Open Support.
NSW Domestic Violence Line
Free call 1800 656 463
Translating and Interpreting Services: 13 14 50
TTY 1800 67 14 42
The Domestic Violence Line is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week